And we're off.........................

So, first I have to thank everyone for the most encouraging notes! Sometimes in our lonely cyber world, it is easy to forget just how many friends you have. And really, it is all of you that will make this adventure easier and a little less daunting.

So with that said, we have a meeting. Yes, we are off to meet our two girls on Tuesday. I must say, I am doing EVERYTHING possible to keep my expectation grounded. This is not easy. Let me just say, when you go for foster parenting training (yes, there is training) they do all they possibly can to hammer it into our heads that we absolutely, positively will not have an Orphan Annie, "The Sun Will Come Out Tomorrow", experience. They are relentless about it and truly, while they are so grateful to have you there, they do nearly everything they can to scare you off. I guess it is the prepare for the worst, hope for the best theory on steroids. However, while I know that I need to stay grounded lower then the Grand Canyon, I can't help but day dream just a little.......

Along those lines, I must say, that while this manor of enhancing and expanding a family may be a little different, I am noticing more than a few similarities to the other two time I was getting ready to become a parent. The most glaring one right this minute is NESTING! I don't care how you are bringing a child into a family or what kind of family it is, this is turning out to be a universal for me.

When I was getting married and my (step) son was going to be my son full time, what did I do? Paint his room, rearrange the house, bought furniture, new linens, stuffed animals and books, pictures......... I was going to have a great space for him to grow up in!

When I found out I was pregnant with my Peanut, once again, off to the races! Picked out boarder, paint, motifs, and all the baby stuff I could muster. Once again, I was going to have a great space for her to grow up in.

Well, once again, here I am. I painted, rearranged, rearranged again, and again. I think all the rearranging was because there is little else to do. Going into it, I had no idea the sex, age, likes etc of the child or children that we would be bringing into our home (or frankly the permanency of the arrangement) So I keep shifting stuff around, adding, subtracting and once again, rearranging. But in the mist of all of it, it does give me a chance to reflect. (And plan revenge on my family that keeps making fun of me for rearranging AGAIN) In those reflections, I think this is what I have come up with; nesting is my way taking a break from all the worry of the enormity of impending parenthood and focus on the fun things to come. It is a moment to not think about character development but about crafts at the kitchen table. It is a moment to table college funds and think about pictures on the first day of school and where to hang them. Most importantly, it is a chance to forget about the overwhelming lifetime commitment you are making and focus on the here and now and joy of it. I think that this is universal to all parents, all of us. It is a moment when anything and everything is possible and the future is just that, the future.

So this weekend, I will ONCE AGAIN, be rearranging the bedrooms and shuffling furniture. I will be trying to be practical all the while, day dreaming about the future. Who knows, the children may not like us, we may not think they are a good fit, it all may come crashing down around our heads come Tuesday. But this Labor Day weekend, it is all about nesting....... and possibilities.

See you Tuesday!